Are you frustrated you keep doing what you don’t want to do, repeating the same old loop while intending to climb free of the habit of unproductive thinking?

We all have those moments… days… years.

It seem by default we place our attention on what we don’t want by thinking it will bring us what we want. We attempt to create peace by fighting against war. We try to be prosperous by worrying about money. We try to be youthful by resisting being sick, getting old, and talking about our aches and pains.

Sure, it’s easy to say, “Think positive”, “Focus only on what you want”, and “Fear is only False Experiences Appearing Real”. This is easier said than done when we feel caught up in life’s drama.

In these less than conscious moments how do we avoid this pit-fall? How do we truly hold our attention authentically on what we want: peace, prosperity, and health.

At least we are not alone as we create a new earth and re-connect with our authentic self. This habit of misplaced focus is always tripping me up on my road to happiness, how about you?. The good news is that ife is a journey, remember, and we can remind one another when we detour from the truth?

So, how, exactly, do we “Don’t do that”? How do we expand authentic happiness?

1. Take and applaud simple small steps. Not huge ones, just taking baby steps will make a HUGE difference. Over-ride your perfectionist tendencies just for a moment. Celebrate itty-bitty steps, rather than judge them as not big enough.

Yoda of Star Wars fame is one of my favorite teachers! Here is an example of his wisdom…

Luke: I can’t. It’s too big.
Yoda – Jedi Master: Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship.

2. Next, imagine what your life would be like if you were only a little happier, more calm, less worried. What would it feel like to have your life even 1% or 2% happier than it is now? And then another 1% or 2%?

3. Now, create more of those thoughts. Hang out in them for awhile. This is what will create the change you long for and bring more consistent joy, not focusing on what you don’t want. Imagine what your life becomes when you toss aside negative thoughts and feelings while asking yourself a few valuable questions that lead closer to the truth. Come on, just try… Right now, can you feel a little happier? Just a little? How about feeling a little more in-love? Can you feel a little more calm… prosperous… accepted… at peace? Who would you be if you didn’t have the troubling thoughts and shifted gears to focus on feeling just a little bit better?

4. Next, surround yourself with those who lovingly and respectfully call you to your highest and best.

5. Each night before your head hits the pillow, let this be enough. Heck, even let it be fun. Put your hand on your heart as you fall asleep or any time you feel like it, and feel the heart beat of the person you really are, the person that comes out of hiding when you allow yourself to feel even a little bit happier. If you resist this process, believe it is impossible to be happy little by little, expect it to be hard, and find every reason it won’t work, it most likely you will be right.

4. So now, ask yourself if you would rather be right or happy. Answer honestly. Notice what bubbles up, and then proceed (or not).

Your own happiness is the greatest gift any woman can offer another. Your authentic happiness is the greatest gift we can offer the world.

If durable happiness is your true wish, spend more time leaning in the direction of joy in small increments. Then repeat. This will benefit us all. The good news is that  this is the way to have happiness expand.

Sometimes simple things are not the easiest. Need more help?

Of course you can read my book, Drive Yourself Happy: A ‘Motor-vational’ Maintenance Manual for Maneuvering Through Life:
http://www.detourfromstress.com
http://www.driveyourselfhappy.com

There are also three wonderful people I admire who have dedicated their lives to your happiness. They have developed powerful and simple approaches that will enable you and I to let go of the negativity, the
distractions and the fears and expand your ability to “don’t do that”, honoring small yet profound steps.

They are:

Michael Neill, author of Feel Happy Now
http://www.geniuscatalyst.com/

Lester Levenson, the creator of the Release Technique/Sedona Method
http://www.lesterlevenson.org/

Byron Katie, founder of The Work, and author of  Loving What Is
http://www.thework.com

In their simple ways, they will remind us that when we allow ourselves to feel happier . . . we will be happier.

And Yoda reminds us…

Luke: All right, I’ll give it a try.
Yoda: No. Try not. Do… or do not. There is no try.